Friday, July 07, 2006

An Open Letter to the Guy Who Borrowed the Sports Section of my Newspaper on the Mrt Station

Dear Sir,

Look, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings.

I was minding my own business, innocently reading the sports page of the daily while waiting for the train when you asked me who won in the semis. I figured you're not much of a football fan if you didnt know yet - so I said "France won 1-0 by a penalty shot". I thought that was the end of it but then you began asking more questions like which team I'm betting for in the finals(Italy!) or my bet for the 3rd place(Germany!) and the next thing I knew, I was sitting next to you in the train.

I was looking forward to a nice, quiet train ride while reading the news but I guess that was not to be so I reluctantly let you borrow the sports section. Maybe you were more interested in talking than in my newspaper because you began asking your next batch of questions. You asked for my name first - now I don't have any qualms giving my name to strangers because I think my name is very common thus forgettable. But you went on and on about the meaning of my name and you concluded it means a flower. Haha! I have to tell you it's just a little girl's name in my country, and I was told before that in India it means an old rich lady storekeeper.

Maybe you were satisfied with my answer because you proceeded with your next question which is - "Are you single?". Okay, I admit this one has caught me off guard - I was that surprised that I can only tell the truth. So I said yes. I mean why would you ask a stranger this question?? Why? I only answer this type of question when I fill up immigration forms in the airport or something like that.

By that time, I was starting to get really sorry that I brought a newspaper with me. I didn't know it can be such a stalker-magnet. Or maybe it was my eyes - yeah I think my eyes did it. Because yesterday, my eyes were all nice and blood-shot. From not getting enough sleep. From waking up at 3am in the morning for 2 consecutive days to watch the semis.

By the time you asked your next question, I convinced myself that I should lie. You wanted to know what time I usually leave work. Now, I'm not very sharp when I lack sleep but I think I realized then what you were up to. Most of the time, I leave the office by 7-8pm so I said around 9-10 pm. I was feeling smug about my lying when you said "Me too!". And what do you know, we get off at the same mrt station! You were still holding my newspaper so I was kinda waiting for you to hand it back which you did after a few more minutes of walking. I was congratulating myself by then, I managed not to be rude, and now I can continue my reading and I guess all in all you were a pretty harmless guy.

But why did you have to hand your phone to me? And ask me my number? You caught me off guard for the second time and damn it I couldn't invent a phone number that fast so I gave you my number. stupid stupid stupid. And that was the last time I have seen you. But not the last I have heard of you of course. After 3 text messages, and 4 missed calls from you - I realized ignoring you is not the way to get through you. I had to be cruel to be kind, so I sent you an honest and unmerciful message and it worked.

I wish you all the best, and I hope you should think of the train station next time not as a place to make friends but as a means of transportation.

Sincerely,
Lala

(I got the open letter idea from McSweeney's Open Letters to people or entities who are unlikely to respond. They're hilarious.)

5 comments:

candylicious said...

ang haba ng hair mo, lala! hehehehe.. :D

caffeinated attorney said...

nice one, lala! i think i should try that open letter thing, too. :)

weng said...

100% Intention = 100% Results

Tiongks said...

just give out this number next time - 555-f-off hehehe

grabe, totoo ba to?

lala said...

candy,
haha oo nga e. di pa ako nag a eye shadow nyan ha

jane,
hmmm... para kanino ang open letter? sige nga hehe

weng,
ang laki na ng mga kids mo!

tiongks,
sa kasamaang palad, totoo ito. hehehe

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